A little inspiration.

The day-to-day general office work task are not the most exciting to deal with. For that reason, I have begun a new series of inspirational posters for my co-workers and myself. Yesterday was filing day, exciting right? Wrong! Here is our inspiration poster to encourage accurate and fun filing time:


Picture is from the Color Collective Blog http://color-collective.blogspot.com/.

 Today, I am feeling a little under the weather! This inspirational poster is helping in my recovery:


Also from the Color Collective blog.



What the blog is that about!

Months! It has been months since I have updated this blog. Why? Cause my life just simply isn't as interesting to anyone now that I am back in Tulsa. Although, from time to time I think, "Wow, that was cool, maybe I should blog about it," but I don't. Instead my social media obsessed-self looks for other outlets of communication with the entire world. Mostly, Twitter and Facebook.

Work - 45 hours of my week are spent at work. Doing what you may ask... Can't say, I would have to kill you, and since you are a dedicated reader of my blog I just can't risk losing your statistic. I work in the Contracts, Bids & Proposal department of a company that does training and simulation for the military. Mostly government contracting and administration. Pretty great stuff. My boss is friendly and rather great. Co-workers are amazing and I would have been friends with them in high school - This is my new cataloging of friendworthyness that I have begun to use. I think to myself "would I have talked to this person in high school?" If the answer is yes, then welcome to the club, but no, well, you probably aren't reading this blog.

Caravan - believe it or not, I think about 10% of my time each month is spent at Tulsa's little gem, Caravan. Caravan, what is that? If you are asking, then its probably because you have never been to visit me in Tulsa, for every person that is ever to step on Okie soil is sure to be carried, by one friend or another to Caravan. Caravan Cattle Co. is the official name and line-dancing is their game. Image you are at a carnival, but everyone is dressed in boots, jeans and plaid (there are a few clown there, but I try my best to avoid them). This place would definitely be on Stefon's weekend clubs to attend if he were the SNL Weekend Update Tulsa Correspondent. It's got everything - midgets, people in wheelchairs, muffin mama's (This is when a ladies jeans are so tight and sparkly that it presses every inch of fat over the top - creating a muffin silhouette.), old creepers, frat boys, brides-to-be, pregnany ladies, cowboys, cowgirls, people from Bethlehem, free beers for ladies (Only beneficial in persuading ladies to attend, which helps my probability of a dance pretty high) and dancing fools. Wonderful little place - I suggest you check it out.

Other - You know how there is always an 'other' category in things? Everything else I have been up to would fall into this category. Other activities include eating, mostly because any other thing I do has something to do with eating. Baking! I bake quite often, but in the end it really is only to the benefit of my jaw muscle and to make my friends like me. Going out with friends, usually to eat something. Hosting parties, usually food is involved. Visiting my family, food is most definitely always involved. Eating - I think every one's world kind of revolves around this simple verb. Eat.

Plans, hopes and updates to this blog - I will update it whenever I find fit! I hope this will be more than once every three months.

Host Family: A Biography.

Family photo on Cijin Island.

Like any family, my host family had it's crazy, it's weird and it's wonderful moments. I thought I would share with you some outstanding qualities of each member so that you can better know who they are. My host family was a normal size (by Taiwan standards), consisting of a mom, dad, older son, and younger son.

Tina.

Host Mom
Name: Tina (English), Ms. Chuang (Chinese, not really it's Chuang!).
Hobbies: Organizing play dates for her children (including myself), declaring "No Chinese" days for her children, being bossy, cooking awesome breakfast, making mango-pineapple juice, planning events, and showing off her trophy foreigner to others. 
Most memorable moment: She came with me to Taipei after the homestay was over and at the farewell banquet gave me a giant huge... She didn't let go until we were both in tears.
Likes: She kept me busy with tours, events, food and play dates.
Dislikes: She really did treat me like one of her children! Did I mention I am twenty-three?

Pictured on far left. You can also see his parents who joined us from time to time.

Host Dad
Name: Mr. Ou (He has the same family name as Obama - He mentioned it often)
Hobbies: Driving us around town, speaking gibberish (I could never understand his Chinese), riding around on an awesome orange collapsible bike and shouting.
Most memorable moment: Driving in the car, he finally decides to play some music and he sings aloud to a song sung by a women way out of his range. Instant love.
Likes: He had a car, which meant we could go anywhere.
Dislikes: Could never talk to him because I could never understand his Chinese. Worst Taiwanese accent on the universe and no English.

Alex the silly.

Alex loved food!

Host Brother 1
Name: Alex (English), Ou Su Yi  (Chinese)
Hobbies: Playing UNO, eating six bowls of rice at every meal, speaking English, translating Carlos' awful Chinese or English to Tina, Angry birds, Touching my computer screen, magic tricks, eating and angering his mother.
Most memorable moment: I taught him the joke about the double meaning of sea food/see food. He used it successfully at various moments during dinner that day.
Likes: Ability to speak English, always knew which food I would like, bad at playing uno and he knew magic!
Dislikes: Too clingy, enjoyed making Jimmy mad, obsession with my smart phone.

We are still working on his jumping photos, but his future looks promising.

Jimmy.

Host Brother 2
Name: Jimmy (English), Ou Jia Mi (Chinese)
Hobbies: Angry birds, UNO, being cute, throwing tantrums, playing paper-scissors-rock, eating ice cream, handing my hand, posing for pictures and being a picky eater.
Most memorable moment: High-fiving each other after our team won a game of basketball!
Likes: Great a jumping photos, was respectful, darn cute and I could understand all of his Chinese.
Dislikes: Suffered a little emperor syndrome at times, got angry at times giving him the nickname Mr. Angrybirds Jimmy.

My host family was wonderful!

Our first meeting.

Barbarians Eat Chicken... With gloves.

One of my last days in Kaohsiung and my host family decides to take me to a placed called dream mall for a special treat.

Wow 'Dream Mall,' I think to myself, must be awesome. And it was! Dream Mall is huge and has a ferris wheel on the roof and tons of expensive stuff not worth buying.

Little did I know the 'treat' my host family was talking about was eating at Taiwan's own food sensation, a place call Century 21. They sell rotisserie chicken meals. ROTISSERIE CHICKEN! For about 450 Taiwan Dollars the whole family shared a WHOLE chicken, fries, salad, sweet potato fries and some friend chicken.

Host mom: Do you have this food in the USA?
Me: Bahaha, yes. I think we invented it.
Host mom: (surprised) Really? Is it expensive.
Me: Nope its pretty cheap.
Host mom: And how does the taste compare because this is a Taiwanese company and its famous.
Me: (are you kidding me!) Its about the same.

The most ridiculous part is that they believe it to amazing and a special treat (cute) AND they eat it with their bare hand WHILE WEARING PLASTIC GLOVES!

Do you like?

There seems to be an apparently mis-communication in the Taiwanese education system with the verbs ‘like’ and ‘want.’ This has been evident with my host family in the week that I have lived with them.

Host brother: Carlos, do you like ice cream.

Me: Yes, I like ice cream.

Host brother: Mother, Carlos wants ice cream, he likes it a lot and wants to eat it.

Host mother: Husband, let’s get Carlos some ice cream.

Me: I don’t want any ice cream right now.

Everyone: (confusion ensues)

Another prime example of where the Taiwanese confuse the verb ‘like’ with the verb ‘want.’

Host brother: Carlos, do you like mountain climbing.

Me: (with my inability to express a mild liking for things I say…) Yes, I like it a little.

Host brother: Mother, Carlos loves mountains and climbing them.

Host mother: I will call my sister, she lives near a mountain we can climb. Tomorrow morning we will go, okay?

Me: I don’t want to go mountain climbing today or tomorrow.

Everyone (confusion ensues)

Just keep swimming.

The Taiwanese swimming pool rules are a little extreme. My host brothers both take swimming lessons and I got to accompany them to the pool, along with Lucy one day.

Host Mother: Did you bring swim clothes?

Me: Yes!

Host Mother: Okay, bring them. What about a swim cap? Goggles?

Me: Hahahaa, is that a joke, of course not.

Host Mother: I have some you borrow.

We arrive at the pool, all is good to go. I go into the men’s locker room and discover that everyone must shower before going into the pool. Sure, no problem. I put in my swim gear and head out to the pool.

Host Mother: Where is your swim clothes?

Me: I’m wearing them.

Host Mother: (Really confused) Huh? Okay, I will ask.

She walks over to the pool lifeguard/lord/rules man to ask if it is okay that I wear my ‘swim clothes’ to the pool. All is approved and I get to swim.

Taiwan Swimming Pool Rules:

1. Only Speedos or tight spandex allowed in the pool. NO SWIM TRUNKS! Exception: Carlos the foreigner who looks clueless about everything.

2. All persons must wear protective swim caps.

3. If you are not swimming laps you must get out of the pool or pretend you are swimming laps.

4. Goggles are strongly recommended, so much so that they are mandatory.

5. After you finish swimming you must jump in the zero-degrees-Celsius water followed by the 32-degree-Celsius water. It’s good for the body (Um, NO).

6. No jumping in the pool, no splashing, no laughing, no fun, no talking to others – YOU ARE THERE TO SWIM.

Can I get a Woof Woof.

Dogs! The Taiwanese love their dogs! They are everywhere, but not your typical ASPCA rescue dogs, small fluffy, groomed, with low self-esteem dogs! Everywhere!

In their purse, on their scooters, in their backpacks, at the park, at the restaurant and the store, EVERYWHERE. 

Also, apparently Taiwan has it’s own breed of dog – “it is small and has short hair,!” as it was explained to me by some locals. Wikipedia calls it the Formosan Mountain Dog. Dogs appear to be a fashion trend here. You aren’t up-to-date with the latest fashion if you don’t have a small dog in your bag. I guess the acid-wash jeans, hammer pants, and crazy-as wrinkled skinny jeans weren’t enough.